As the Heir
by SilentSnowLeopardNinja
Summary: Harry's not enjoying the way 2nd year is turning out and decides to do something about it...by making an announcement! That'll show'em.


**Harry Potter in 2nd year about being Slytherin's heir.**

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This...was madness. _Tragic_ even. He thought first year had been a fluke since everyone and their grandpa were spazzing-out about "The Boy-Who-Lived" returning what with the alarming amount of negligence, unprofessional teachers, rude people, and lack of true concern for his health. But it's happening again. But it's worse in a way cuz now everyone seems to want to blame him for the scary stuff happening! All but claiming he's a murderer now despite having been sorted into the house that he was so sure most everyone thought was the best.

Fat load of good that did!

Even his own house mates look at him like he's some kind of villain. And for what? Helping a fellow student by talking to a snake. A _snake_. As if they are the ultimate symbol of evil or something. They're all mad he can speak to certain animals. But not mad at the other kid who brought the dangerous animal with the intent to make it attack.

Hah, yeah there's a _logic_.

Of the stupid kind.

But it's fine. Just fine. They wanna whisper that he's Slytherin's heir like it's fact? Fine. They wanna stare at him with looks of suspicion and hate? Fine. They want an excuse to harass and embarrass him?_ Fine_. The teachers want to turn a blind eye and be jerks too? _Fine_. Let's see if he can make it harder for them.

It's not fair that things are so easy for them all the time when it's never been for him after all. He was gonna have to up his studying, get out of his comfort zone, and take a note out of the twins' book but if it worked even somewhat like he wanted...it'd be worth it. A couple more days pass or weeks. Who keeps up with time anyway? It's been more than a week of this new brand of unfair treatment. Saturday, no classes thankfully, but he's up early regardless like always. Only this time he's moved to the great hall to prepare his scheme.

Gotta make sure all his safety nets are set. He learned a little something about planning ahead from those Dursleys, it was the best way to survive y'know?

Everything was set. Now he just had to wait for the majority of students to show before he could begin. While waiting he managed to eat some food, a bit more than normal despite the nerves because he had a good feeling about this. And those good feelings were rare so _dangit_ if he's not gonna bask in it!

The hall was full now, students and teachers alike sitting about drowsily or eating. Slowly moving up so that the disillusionment charm he placed on himself wouldn't break before he was ready, Harry stood up on his seat and looked about to see if he was tall enough. He would have used his invisibility cloak but didn't want to risk others knowing what it was and trying to steal it or something. Figuring that yes, everyone should be able to see him fine once he was fully visible again he cast the sonorus charm as quietly as he could, feeling quite proud of himself for all the spells he now knew thanks to him searching like crazy at the end of last year for any spells that could help him deal with the Dursleys...even though he later learned that he couldn't actually use them without facing possible expulsion. They'd come in handy now with the new spells he'd learnt at least.

Gathering his courage and the attitude he had when facing an adult that had legit tried to kill him last year he began speaking. "Attention you ignorant jerks and bullies. I have something to say and you'd do well to listen with what little intelligence you can muster!" His disembodied voice echoed slightly in the large chamber, heard by all as some turned their heads wildly looking for the source and a few started badly having been dozing off previously. Cancelling the disillusionment charm so that he was visible once again, all eyes soon landed on his slight form standing upon a chair for added height. It was a rather cute sight though some gasped as if they'd just witnessed something horrifying.

Green eyes solemnly gazed around the room through rounded glasses, "It has become obvious to me that the majority of you believe me to be the heir of Slytherin and wanting to purge the school of muggleborns. Me. The muggle-raised kid with a muggleborn mother. Just because I can understand and talk to snakes. N-", he was cut off by a snarled, "Doesn't change the fact that you're bound to be evil just like-"

"I didn't ask for your opinion!" Harry snarked back before that person could finish. Whomever it was closed their mouth shut with a clack of teeth from surprise.

"Now, I know from a little reading I did that my family is descended from Gryffindor. But since everyone seems so sure that I'm Slytherin's heir as well then I demand my full rights as such!"

"And what rights are those Potter? Going to demand even more special treatment?" Professor Snape growled from his seat looking rather tense with his half empty cup of coffee clenched in his hand. Taking on a false thinking pose Harry hummed for a moment before theorizing, "Well if I'm Heir of Slytherin and possibly Gryffindor too wouldn't that mean I own rights to half the school?"

"Harry this isn't funny! Get down before you get in trouble!" Hermione Granger screeched, having been unable to leave her seat to grab him. Her outburst was only acknowledged by a handful but steadfastly ignored by Harry who was focusing on keeping his game face on.

Headmaster Dumbledore with eyes twinkling merrily in good humor nodded solemnly, "That is true", he acknowledged Harry's question.

"Then I demand that everything from the library to the Quidditch Pitch and above be declared my territory," Harry declared dramatically pounding a fist into the palm of his other hand. "And as my territory I declare a toll to be set up with the proceeds going to the Make the Wizarding World Less Shitty Foundation,-"

"Mr. Potter!", Professor McGonagall objected.

"Or MTWWLS for short", Hermione facepalmed herself as Harry continued smoothly hiding his nerves behind a poker face developed from his time at the Dursley's, "as well as rent from all students residing within from 5th year and up-" several voices shouted in outrage; "with those 4th year and below required to interact with and at least be polite to everyone regardless of house". Several exasperated groans were heard along with indignant shouts this time. "Also since I am the Heir of _Slytherin_, I demand that all former and current Slytherins bow when I enter a room-"

"_**WHAT**_?!" Draco Malfoy and Professor Snape screeched in tandem as other Slytherins grumbled and muffled giggles were heard from the other house tables.

"As well as for all former and current Gryffindors to stand at attention when I enter a room-"

"Just who do think you are you-" bellowed Seamus Finnegan in a confused rage.

"Since I _am_ the direct descendant and therefore most likely heir of Gryffindor" Harry continued without skipping a beat causing others, including Seamus, to blink.

"Albus, do something", Professor McGonagall hissed.

"Yes, this has gone on far enough!" Professor Snape sneered.

"Hm? What do you mean?", Headmaster Dumbledore uttered before popping another piece of lemon square into his mouth. "If he is truly the heir to even one of the founders he is, in fact, entitled to this and other things", Dumbledore revealed jovially uncaring that some of the students seemed to have heard him as they whispered to each other about it.

"Except for Misters George and Fred Weasley. You two may continue as you have been regarding my demands unlike everyone else."

"Yes my leige/As you desire me lord!" The twins shouted with snappy salutes and wide devious grins before cackling in amusement as their brothers gapped at them.

"Furthermore, I demand a harem full of handsome boys and pretty girls to please me-"

"You cannot seriously be claiming this is allowed, he's far too young for things such as this?!" Professor Sprout whispered vehemently over to Dumbledore.

"Well-" Headmaster Dumbledore pondered.

"Auditions are mandatory for 5th years and up once I enter my 6th year. Ignorant small minded idiots and bullies need not apply", Harry finished a touch snootily before calmly hopping off his chair to complete silence under the stares of everyone and striding from the great hall quickly yet not so fast as to appear to be running off.

As soon as he slipped through the doors the whispers started however they were different from the past several days...more lighthearted...excited even... but it wasn't until 5 minutes later that any of them realized that they could in fact get out of their seats.

Hermione Granger fretted over whether to hunt Harry down or not to see what insanity had claimed him.

Ron Weasley simply stood up to better reach the french toast and strawberry syrup.

Albus Dumbledore continued to enjoy his delicious diabetes inducing breakfast.

Professor Snape placed two fingers upon his left temple in attempt to sooth the pain caused by what he had just forced himself to sit through out of curiosity of what Potter was trying to do. He was going to need blacker coffee, the day wouldn't end soon enough.

End.

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I read a lot of fics and get inspired sometimes by something that happens in them. I read a fic where a Naruto crossover with a Slytherin house Harry Potter made a silly announcement accepting the claim as Slytherin's heir so long as his demands were met and it made me think: this is hilarious! But also...what if a Gryffindor house(closer to canon) Harry pulled a similar stunt. But out of frustration to stand up for himself? The fic in question that inspired me is **Arashi no mae no shizukesa **by **Lyn908** took me a short while to re-find it. You should go read it but first read **Arashi ni narimasu **_(by the same person of course)_ before reading that one to understand things better. I reference a few parts of what that author's Harry did in mine with a twist, like having him demand a harem and ownership of parts of the school so that he can charge rent and such(which in my version if it actually happens its to make them literally pay for how they've treated him lol) and making slytherins bow to him. This was me trying to have a 12 year old do a school wide 'harmless' revenge prank that would give him some relief from the mean rumors and bullying if it had the type of affect he hopes for. I've got other ideas inspired by this but they're not as fleshed out and I'm distracted by other ideas in progress.


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